They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize