i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
