Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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