you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize