He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
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