I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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