My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
