Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize