ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
