yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
