Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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