Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
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