Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
