I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
