So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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