around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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