well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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