i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
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