wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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