I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
