my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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