She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
My dick has a subreddit
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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