it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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