Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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