If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
