He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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