i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize