What a fucking waste of an outfit
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
