dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
