ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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