I can text with my tongue
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
