so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
