I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize