the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
