Who did Billy Mays play for?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize