ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
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