I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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