Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
