So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
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