You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize