does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Randomize
