This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
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