ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
As shirtless as possible
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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