Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize