She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
