Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
