thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
