Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Randomize
