He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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