She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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